Goal of Transition

With all the talk about transition, what exactly is the goal of transition? Well, I'm about to find out .. again. Changes happen - some necessary, some unexpected, some unwelcome. Something is ending - my mom's home care. Her needs, and finances, indicate it's time to move from her home to a small board and care facility. I've looked, and my daughter has researched, for over a year and I believe we've found the best place for her. They have Alzheimer's knowledge and experience. Their philosophical approach is just what I hoped for: engage the resident, help the resident, care for the resident. Thinking about the resident - what a concept! You'd be amazed at what I've seen in "care" facilities - residents plunked in front of the tv all day while the caregivers were in their room resting! At one facility I visited, the resident manager kept assuring me "they die happy here." I kept explaining my mother isn't dying. Hmm, but maybe she would be if left in their care.

And while all of this is great in my mind and on paper...how do I help my mother transition when she's unable to process change because of her disease? How will I process it for myself? My husband and I moved into this mobile home park 7 years ago to be near my parents because I knew the bulk of their care would fall to me. My plan was that after Mom and Dad passed away, my husband and I would move on. The first year we were here, Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimers. The second year we were here, Dad had a terrible bout of pneumonia that left him weak and frail, requiring in-home care. Mom, because of the Alzheimers, kept firing the help. In the third year we were here, my husband became ill and then suffered a stroke. In the fourth year we were here, my dad died on Father's Day and 2 days later my husband died of cancer. So much for my plans .... years 5 through 7 have been spent grieving and healing. My Transition to Transformation workshop was born during this time.

I've heard that 8 is the number of new beginnings. As I enter my eighth year here, Mom will be moving to a new beginning of her own and I will adjust, adapt and process this transition. The goal of transition is growth and discovery ... and a new beginning. There is a sense I am standing on the threshold - neither in nor out at this point, but something new is coming. I feel it. I believe it. Next, to discover it!